Breaking Dawn — Part 2 goofs on the famously ab-tacular Lautner by having him not just take his shirt off but strip down all the way to his underwear. Prepare yourself: The audience shrieks are deafening.
But the arrival of this beautiful child draws the suspicion and ire of the Volturi, the vampire elite living in Italy who ... I don't know, govern over these kinds of things? Anyway, they view this half-human, half-vampire as a threat. The bloodsucking Cullen clan and Jacob and his wolfy buddies must band together to prevent an attack, and to prove that the girl's rare existence should be treasured. They do this by traveling the world, gathering other vampires of various ethnicities to form a sort of United Nations of the undead who will vouch for her.
We are all Renesmee Cullen.
The gifted and versatile Michael Sheen unleashes the wonderfully weird performance we always knew was in him as Aro, the sinister leader of the Volturi. His high-pitched laugh alone is both hysterical and menacing.
Meanwhile, Dakota Fanning as the powerful Volturi guard Jane maybe says one word during the entire movie, instead letting her intense, red eyes speak for her.
It's a massive cast that feels even larger during the closing credits, which features a parade of seemingly every actor who's ever appeared in a Twilight movie.
(Hey, there's Anna Kendrick! Oh yeah, and Bryce Dallas Howard!) It's a classy and strangely melancholy send-off. Just as the Twilight series improves, it's going away.